i dont even know how to be here
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
