Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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