I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
