But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
