Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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