Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
