is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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