then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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