Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
What a fucking waste of an outfit
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
where are my pants?
in the oven.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
