Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
