HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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