You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
