I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
My ass is underappreciated
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
