she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize