the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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