We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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