spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
