cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
