Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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