She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
