you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
