I bet he comes in French.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
