i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
