How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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