im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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