porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
We had sex on a dog bed..
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
