Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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