i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
