I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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