He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
