allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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