Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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