Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
