i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
It's never too late to be topless.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize