Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
