I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
