everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize