false alarm. still invincible.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
