no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
