I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She's just so happy...and so naked.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
