Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Just high enough for therapy.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
