its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
