I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
