Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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