Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
