As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
