Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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