She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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