so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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