white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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